Monthly Archives: June 2015

A Short List of Good Stuff Like Love and Sandwiches

It’s Gratituesday! My life overflows with good stuff and I’ve been a slacker about acknowledging that. Here’s a short “list” of some of the yummies I’ve experienced lately.

Carless

Sure I’m without a car at the moment and have to bum rides everywhere, all the time; but hey, people are kind and generous and willing. I discovered Lyft which has bailed me out for a very reasonable price. And my son and his sweet wife have helped out a ton! There’s a vehicle on the horizon so i’m not in this pickle for much longer. Good thing too, because smelling like pickle juice isn’t fun.

Bent Axle

Bent Axle = bummer

And yeah, (add tragedy to inconvenience) I bent the axle on my trusty mountain bike so I haven’t been able to ride for a while, but MSH has okayed and provided the funds for the purchase of an upgraded, snazzier, last-me-for-a-lifetime set of dirt and rock worthy wheels. I just have to pick one out and I’m out on the trails again before the sunrise.

The Heat is ON!

Yes, it’s true, summer is here to stay for another three, or four, or five, months and it’s unbearable outside, but I have AC that’s recently been repaired and I can stay inside and keep cool most of the time. Mornings are, sometimes, cooler than the rest of the day so I can knock out the lawn mowing and trimming and other yard work then without risking my life. And, a friend of my son recently gifted me his no longer needed electric mower, which rocks so completely I can’t even describe how happy I feel. I can plug the thing in and zip around the patch of lawn and be done without ever having to curse, throw out my back, prime the thing or wish death on the inventor of the gas-powered lawn mower motor.

Up Close Love and Sandwiches

Good idea.

And, yes, my kids have scattered to four different states, but one of them still lives here in town and just treated me to lunch at Ike’s Love and Sandwiches today, complete with free desert lollipop. (If you’re local I’d definitely recommend them, on Alma School Road. I hear they’re in Cali, too.) I couldn’t ask for a kinder, more thoughtful son. He always makes sure I feel loved and cared for. Everyone ought to be so lucky!

Long Distance Love

Yup, my girls all live far away, but I can talk on the phone (no long distance charges like it would have been years ago) and Skype/Google Hangout (if I ever get it figured out) and text and get photos all I want. They’re each happy, healthy, and “living the dream” and that makes me happy. Did I mention another “grand” is on the way in November? Can’t wait!

Traveling Writer

There’s a couple of trips in my future. I get to hang out with my extended family for a bit. And then, later on I’ll spend some time with one of my daughters and her family. Here’s a bonus: I don’t have to drive all day or multiple days to get there, I get to fly. Does that feel amazing or what?

Surprise Gifts

K for Kami!

One of my sisters sent me these adorable earrings. She gets me. Scrabble and me are like tight friends. She rocks. I get to hang out with her real soon, which will ramp up the cool factor of my summer by at least fifty.

Read This

I started reading again. That’s big news! It’s been a while since I’ve been able to focus long enough to really take in a book. Not sure why. But my reading groove is back. Last week I read two books. Yes! TWO! (Check out “Lila” by Marilynne Robinson, her writing puts you walking on the road next to the main character, shivering along with the snow blowing and praying out loud beside the forlorn.)

Volunteer Work

Sure I wake up wondering what day it is, every, single, morning. But, I’m still mostly upright and coherent and able to volunteer two days a week at one of my all time favorite places in the world. I get to rub shoulders with great people, feel centered and peaceful and help people out in really cool ways. I keep praying my back behaves, my health cooperates and my attitude stays positive so I can keep doing that.

Clap, clap, clap!

Feeling Blessed

I hope none of this comes across as bragging or anything like that. I just feel super blessed today. In fact, generally I live a life overflowing with things I can express gratitude for. It’s amazing!

You know what? I’ll bet you do, too.

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday | Tags: blessings, good with the bad, Gratitude, Gratituesday, List, opposition, short List, yin and yang | 1 Comment

Will the Real Me Please Stand Up

Friday Letter to my Kids – June 19, 2015 –

Dear J, J, L and L,

I’ll let you in on a little secret.

Age slows you down. You swear it won’t happen to you. Then menopause hits, or a surgery or two, or an autoimmune disorder appears. You cope, you adjust, you medicate, you treat, you pursue other options. You age faster than you thought possible.

You sound like your grandma when she used to try to stand up from her chair. Yeah, that sound. Ooomph, uhhhhhh, psssssshhhhh, ahhhh.

You straighten your back slowly, hoping it doesn’t catch and stay crooked. You feel like a lawn mower that’s sat idle over a few months and needs some oil, fresh gas, a new air filter and a sharpening.

One day you try to roll out of bed and wonder what alien life form took over your body in your sleep. Your feet hurt, your legs turn to bags of rocks. Nimble no longer describes anything about you except perhaps your wallet.

Truth.

The mirror betrays you.

The scale lies.

Your clothes shrink overnight.

Brain cells shrivel and rearrange themselves.

And forget the whole memory thing. I recall at thirty something, staring at Big L and being completely blank on what your name was. I tried to say your name, not even the letter L graced the screen of my brain. Nada. Imagine putting a couple of decades on top of that early memory loss and you’re staring at a mega data sink hole.

I’m fighting it. Not sure where I’d find a personal trainer who helps you win against aging and old person syndrome. But time isn’t on my side and neither are the odds. I pedal my bike pretending I’m sixteen, but looking more than a few decades older and slightly wider than that. Surely there’s more countermeasures to deploy in beating back the aches and arthritis and aging process.

Why do I tell you this, in your prime, your vigorous amazing twenties and thirties?

Photo by Paweł Grzywocz

It’s a sign. it’s one of those small roadside poster sized signs you see two hundred miles from your destination. “There will be other signs,” you think to yourself, “as I get closer.”

And there are. But those miles roll by in the hectic pace of life with kids and schedules and work and fun.

I swore in my teens: “I will never grow old. I refuse to look old or act old or become old!” And now I’m offered the senior citizen discount by the AC repairman without even getting asked for my ID. So what if I saved twenty-five dollars. My already tilted world slanted a bit more and I felt myself sliding toward some abyss.

Well, that’s a bit dramatic.

But still. Imagine that happening to you. At your age! You’d feel disheartened and brushed aside, too.

In my head I’m not really any older than you. Just a little more jaded, a little slower. The real me inside dances to Queen’s lyrics, “we will, we will, rock you!” The real me holds up a lighter and sings “we are the champions, my friend!”

The real me never actually grows old!

Here’s real secret I meant to share with you: neither will you.

All my love,

Mom

~~~~~

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.” ~ Sophia Loren

Categories: Friday Letter to My Kids | Tags: aging, change, Family, Friday letter, Friday Letter to my Kids | 1 Comment

I Missed Celebrating an Important Birthday

Posted on June 17, 2015 by Kami

Photo by Joey Gannon from Pittsburgh, PA (Candles) [CC BY-SA 2.0 ], via Wikimedia Commons

I missed celebrating an Important Birthday!

Actually, I didn’t really miss it. I thought about it all that day.

I just avoided acknowledging it out loud.

Today I spent time with the birthday girl’s daughter-in-law. We talked about life with Kathy. It felt good and more than okay to say her name; the twinge I usually get when I talk about her out loud didn’t pinch quite so much. Not sure why.

Anyway, that bit of conversation knocked open a closed door. Which makes it possible to share this song that gut-punched me a year ago.

By that I mean the song spoke right to my heart, my head, my spirit.

Yeah, I’ve kept it to myself for a while now. Well, I did share it with MSH, cuz he already gets it. If no one else gets it, that’s okay.

I had decided long before birthday time that I’d share this on her day. And then I couldn’t. Didn’t. Refused to. Which, looking back, seems selfish. So I’ve included this gem by Sarah McLachlan from Toy Story 2. Listen with your ears and with your heart and you’ll get a glimpse of friendship at its most real.

The relationship Kathy and I had changed me. What a gift she was and continues to be for me. She taught me to love myself, to embrace the weird wonderfulness of me. It doesn’t get much better than what we had. What a blessing!

Happy Belated Birthday Kathy, my friend. No regrets! Love ya!

“How many slams in an old screen door? Depends how loud you shut it. How many slices in a bread? Depends how thin you cut it. How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live ’em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give ’em.” ~ Shel Silverstein

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” ~ Elbert Hubbard