Trying to Count Blessings in a World of Hurt

It’s Gratituesday. Today I’m thankful for the chance to drive my friend Kathy to her appointments at the Mayo Hospital and Mayo Clinic. There’s a mixed bag of blessings.

• I’m grateful that I have a very flexible job and a generous boss who allows me time off to help Kathy out.

• I’m grateful that two Mayo facilities are within a forty-five minute drive from our neighborhood. Some people fly from around the country or out of the country to get treated and then fly home again. Kathy and I can hop in the car an hour before her appointment, stop for a soda and get there right on time.

•  I’m grateful for the extra time Mayo and all those horrific yet helpful poisons/drugs has given me with Kathy. Every single day I get to hear her cute voice saying hello is a blessing to me. I’m just selfish with that one.

• I’m grateful that between the hospital and the clinic is a great place called Flo’s. It’s Kathy’s favorite place to get Chinese food this side of China. We’ve shared some great laughs there, buried a few tears, ignored reality momentarily and eaten like royalty.

Winding through that gratitude, hovers this pain Kathy continues to feel as the cancer works its slow, wicked way around and through her life and body. I’m not grateful for that, let’s be honest here. If I could I would take away her suffering, cut this kind of cancer out, eradicate such misery from the world. But that is not in the cards, not part of the plan, not one of the options. Nope.

Damn it all.

So I accept and hang on to what I can, our friendship, her powerful example of bravery, moments of good amidst the profound sadness and misery.

Fire up the grill Flo, we’re on our way.