Gratituesday

Pencils, Batters, Sewing, Music and Typing?

It’s Gratituesday! Today I’m thankful for do-overs. Something about second chances fills me with hope.

Eraser

Eraser (Photo credit: plounsbury)

All kinds of second-time-around opportunities surround us that we might not even see as do-overs.

  • A batter taking a swing gets at least three chances, more if a couple swings send foul balls flying.
  • Pencils are built for second chances. An eraser on top implies that mistakes happen and rewriting occurs. That’s not a weakness in the pencil design, it’s a recognition that we humans inevitably goof.
  • Sewing tools include seam rippers that help you take stitches out when something has gone wrong. Tiny snippets of thread undo a bit at a time until the entire length of stitching is removed. It’s then ready for another go at the needle.
  • Practicing piano, or violin, trombone, drums, flute, guitar or any musical instrument serves as many second chances to get it right before a performance.
  • The delete button on my keyboard makes do-overs easy and quick. When I first learned to type the second chance required back spacing then messy white-out followed by drying time, then a retype.

Repairs Ahead

Second chances abound. They serve as reminders that I am a work in progress and so is everyone around me.

My daily do-over starts with the beginning of another day where I have a new chance to get something right today that I made a mess of yesterday. Maybe that’s another reason I like mornings so much.

English: Pencil Eraser Deutsch: Radiergummi mi...

Second’s the Best

Remarriage after a divorce is a blessed do-over. I don’t know the stats but logically you’d think that things would go better in that new relationship because of lessons learned the first time around. Not to mention, there’s that appreciation factor, having lost something, then found it again, you cherish it more, care for it more, keep an eye on it better.

My son ties the knot later this week. This second chance at marriage bubbles over with joy and promise and so many good things. I want to dance across the park, shout over the tree tops, run like a banshee and sing at the top of my lungs.  Don’t worry, I’ll remain dignified and just smile as the happy tears run down my face.

Ah, the blessedness of a second chance.

Pencils ready?

A great song to go along with this idea:

Enjoy a song all about second chances.

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Joy, Relationships | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A Few Precious Years of Laughter

It’s Gratituesday! Today I’m thankful for the sweetness of elementary school-aged children. In many of them there still abides an innocence and freshness to their view of the world. I heard two jokes today from a friend’s daughter that reminded me of that precious time of life.

Giving credit where credit is due, these jokes came from the mouth of Kyrsten and brought a lightness to my heart and a smile to my face.

“Why did the football stadium get so hot when the game was over? 

-Because all the fans walked out!”

Kawasaki-Electric Fan

Kawasaki-Electric Fan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I love the image of hundreds of spinning fans wobbling out of a stadium chatting about the game.  Don’t you?

Then there was this one:

“Why can’t banks keep any secrets?

– because there are so many tellers.”

Old bank building

Old bank building (Photo credit: Mr Wabu)

Ten years old, bright with a sense of humor that finds delight in simple, clean word play.There’s no guile, no manipulation, no hidden agenda. How wonderful those few precious years of newness and wonder! Reminds me of my own young childhood. How lucky I was to have had that.

Reminders that such a unsullied view of the world still exists make my heart grateful and give me hope.

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Hope, Humor | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Small Delight, Immeasurable Joy

It’s Gratituesday! Today I am grateful for tiny pink toenails, sticky handprints, sidewalk chalk scribbles, sand-filled shoes, small hands clasped in mine, here and now thinking and snuggles.

My two-year old granddaughter calls back long-lost days as a young mother. I feel almost, but not quite, like a time-traveler. There’s something about the intervening years that allow me to relish her tiny, detail-oriented, focus-scattered perspective.

The tiniest of bugs receive her full, undivided attention as they travel across the sidewalk. Butterflies, pebbles, birds, airplanes, the moon, dirt specks, water droplets, the small and the large all occupy the whole of that specific moment. For having such a short attention span she sees more than I do in a day.

Seeing the world anew through toddler eyes opens my own eyes wide with wonder.

It’s refreshing to slow to her small steps and engage again in the tangible world.

At the same time she seems to travel at light speed at times. Focused on doing a task she’s set for herself, such as filling the tub with toys for bath time, or getting ready for a trip to the park. It can take all I have to keep up with her rocketing from room to room, books to buckets, kitchen toys to stuffed tigers, blankies to sippy cups. Her toddler speed can take my breath away with her energy and excitement and unpredictability.

There exist few other delights as rich and full as those this sweet girl brings me. For her smile that brings one to my face I am ever so grateful.

20130423-110101.jpg

Cutest two-year old I know.

Categories: Family, Gratitude, Gratituesday, Joy | Tags: , , | 4 Comments

Trying to Count Blessings in a World of Hurt

It’s Gratituesday. Today I’m thankful for the chance to drive my friend Kathy to her appointments at the Mayo Hospital and Mayo Clinic. There’s a mixed bag of blessings.

photo-11 copy 3

  • I’m grateful that I have a very flexible job and a generous boss who allows me time off to help Kathy out.
  • I’m grateful that two Mayo facilities are within a forty-five minute drive from our neighborhood. Some people fly from around the country or out of the country to get treated and then fly home again. Kathy and I can hop in the car an hour before her appointment, stop for a soda and get there right on time.
  •  I’m grateful for the extra time Mayo and all those horrific yet helpful poisons/drugs has given me with Kathy. Every single day I get to hear her cute voice saying hello is a blessing to me. I’m just selfish with that one.
  • I’m grateful that between the hospital and the clinic is a great place called Flo’s. It’s Kathy’s favorite place to get Chinese food this side of China. We’ve shared some great laughs there, buried a few tears, ignored reality momentarily and eaten like royalty.

photo-11 copy 4Winding through that gratitude, hovers this pain Kathy continues to feel as the cancer works its slow, wicked way around and through her life and body. I’m not grateful for that, let’s be honest here. If I could I would take away her suffering, cut this kind of cancer out, eradicate such misery from the world. But that is not in the cards, not part of the plan, not one of the options. Nope.

Damn it all.

So I accept and hang on to what I can, our friendship, her powerful example of bravery, moments of good amidst the profound sadness and misery.

Fire up the grill Flo, we’re on our way.

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What Day Is It?

It’s Gratituesday! Today I’m thankful for those rare days that happen when time slows, pauses and provides a restful sense of calm and peace.

Most often these are three-day weekends. You know that Friday-feels-like-Saturday sensation? Mmmm. Then the real Saturday feels like a bonus day. Then a tangible slowness silently inhabits Sunday. To-do lists cease to exist. Urgency disappears. Sweat pants or pajamas fill all clothing requirements.

Catlike, I nap, liquid, languorous and delicious. Stretching, I peer at the hours that lay before me, unhurried and unworried.

Add in a Monday free from obligations and by Monday evening I’ve transformed into a new person, rejuvenated, alight with quiet energy, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

All this finds more pleasure if the people you’re with are agreeable to a slow pace, quiet talk, flexible meal times, ignoring clocks, lazy strolls, comfy couches and plenty of chocolate.

I’ve been fortunate, richly blessed, to have just had such a weekend. I’m all smiles and ease. Just what I’ve been needing.

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Ground cover softening a stone path beside a small pond.

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Mental Health | Tags: , , , , | 2 Comments

It’s GRATITUESDAY! A Guest Post “Saving a Life!”

It’s GRATITUESDAY today! Yes, I capitalized it, because I am extra grateful today. Two years ago, three people saved my son’s life. Rarely does a day pass that I don’t think about and feel thankful to them for being willing to help out a stranger. Thank you Michael Harrison, Rustin Crawford and Sarah Crawford for being Angels that day!!

Sarah wrote on her blog about the rescue. So in celebration, today’s post is Sarah Crawford’s words telling her story of saving my son’s life. It’s a great story, with a wonderful ending. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

From the Crawford Chronicles: Saving a life!

“Rustin and I were blessed to be at the right place at the right time to help save an unconscious man from a burning car on Saturday (March 26, 2011) evening at 5:00 pm. Rustin was driving (just got his permit) and we were headed to a lacrosse friends house. As soon as we turned from our street to the main street that runs through our neighborhood (Juniper) we saw a white car parked on the side of the road with a lot of white smoke coming from the hood and pouring over the car.

Another person (Michael Harrison, whose family I know well) had already stopped and had discovered that there was a person in the car who was unconscious. Rustin immediately pulled over and ran to help Michael pull the man out of the burning car. He did have to show me how to dial 911 on his phone really quick first! The call would not go through because all the lines were busy and so I ran to help Rustin and Michael who had the guy out of the car, but he was still laying on the street by the door. He was a very heavy (220 lbs) and floppy man and was extremely hard to move. Rustin said later that he was really glad he’d been in weightlifting class at school.  NO KIDDING!!!

Look how much bigger Jeremy (220 lbs) is than Rustin who is 5’10” and 150 lbs. The other rescuer was taller than Rustin but much skinnier and was happy to have Rustin’s muscles there to help!

We moved him to the side of the road behind the car, but didn’t stay there long as we were getting covered with smoke that was increasing in volume rapidly and had turned black as the car started to really catch fire. We hefted poor Jeremy (who was still totally out) and carried him to the other side of the road in the bike lane. We layed him there and rested a bit. His eyes were a little bit open but he couldn’t move or speak and looked really sick. I had no idea what was wrong with him, if he had inhaled enough smoke to pass out or had passed out before the car caught fire or what but I was very concerned and just rubbed his head and told him everything was going to be okay and prayed and prayed and prayed that it would be. After a bit, we decided to move him because the fire department was still not there and the fire was getting really big and hot and I could hear things exploding and popping inside the car and I thought it might blow up.

Fortunately, the car never blew up but it left a lot of ashes and debris behind after they towed it!

When Rustin and Mike and I and a few others moved him further down the road, he was starting to wake up and was actually moving his feet a little for us. As he started becoming more aware, he became anxious and tried to walk away from us, though he couldn’t really walk. There was no way we were going to let this potentially very sick individual wander off before the ambulance go there so we tried to wrestle him to the ground. It didn’t work. As you can see from the picture, he is a very big and VERY strong guy. Randy Harenberg, my husband, Russ- who Rustin had run and gotten, and others, tried to calm him down and keep him around while we waited for the fire trucks to arrive. They finally got there and… No, it wasn’t MY firemen, the Gilbert firetrucks were all out on calls and this was Mesa fire to the rescue.

Unfortunately, they had only heard that there was a car fire but not a victim in the car, so at first they just worked on getting the car fire out until finally a paramedic noticed my dad and I frantically waving at them to come help Jeremy. We told them what was going on and they soon found out how strong Jeremy was. It took several police officers and firemen to finally tackle Jeremy into the bushes and get some handcuffs on him to keep him down. Poor guy!!!! He kept asking for someone to help him and saying “Ow!” I felt so bad and just stayed close to try to offer any comfort I could.

After a while they got him some tranquilizers to sedate him a little and then got him on a stretcher. As he calmed down, he was more responsive and told them his name was Jeremy and that he suffered from seizures. They figured that the medicine on the front seat (that he had just picked up from Target) was his anti-seizure medication.

Rustin and I stayed and gave a statement to the police and gave them my number and asked them to call and let me know how Jeremy was doing and if they ever figure out just what had happened. They said they would try, but might not know themselves.

After Jeremy was safely on his way to the hospital, I took Rustin to his friend’s house and then zoomed home for a quick shower and some clothes (By the way- all of this was happening as I was wearing only a swimsuit and a sweatshirt! Put on clothes before you leave the house! You never know what might happen!!!) then I took off for the dinner and a meeting I was missing.

About 45 minutes after I got there, Russ texted me the most amazing text:

“The kid whose car burned was Kami Tilby’s son!” 

I can’t explain the emotion to know that poor Jeremy, who I had been praying over, was the son of one of my most favorite friends in the entire world. She has helped me in so many ways through every step of the last few insane and very difficult months of my life, starting before my sister Liza died, but especially since then. To have been able to help save her son’s life and bless hers forever in a very real way is such an honor. I am so grateful that Rustin and I were there to help him and her and her precious family!

So on Sunday night we got to meet our Jeremy!!!!

It turns out that Jeremy does indeed suffer from seizures and takes medication to control them. He had missed two days of medication and had just refilled his prescription and then visited his parents who live just a few houses from me. As he rounded the corner to Juniper, he felt the aura of a seizure coming on and knew he had to pull over and put the car into park. It took his body about 100 yards to be able to do that and he stopped about 20 yards before the main intersection at Val Vista! Phew!!!

Then he had a seizure and it is believed that he must have accidentally pushed down on the pedal and revved the engine so high that it overheated and caught fire. Sometime after that we arrived on scene.

He doesn’t remember being pulled from the car or being carried around but does vaguely remember the struggle on the ground with the police, and asking for help. He says it is foggy like a dream. Then he “woke up” in the hospital, not really sure why he was there and why he had grass (which was actually straw from one of the bushes) all over him.

He was so sweet when he met Rustin and I, reaching out for big bear hugs and saying “Thank you, Thank you!”

You are so welcome Jeremy!!!

So glad we could feel what it feels like to be an angel and be part of a miracle. That same day, Saturday, was the two month anniversary of Liza’s death and I had cried quite a few tears just a few hours before this happened. It was so nice to have things turn around and get to be part of such a happy ending for such a great person and family.

Maybe Liza was there helping too!

Maybe we were both angels that day?!”

The view from the driver’s seat- nice windsheild.  Getting worse…
The back seat! Can you see the toasted head rests from the front seats.
The right side of the car- Really toasted!!! From where we were standing we could see the huge flames shooting up through the windows. They did a lot of damage! Glad it was EMPTY!!!
Jeremy’s backpack that was on the back seat. Toasty! His ipod inside it was unharmed. PHEW!”
Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Relationships | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

The Ups and Downs of a Mouse’s Life

Some days and weeks are like a roller coaster ride.

 

Somehow, I’ve never quite learned how to deal with the sudden shifts in mood, perspective and direction that life can throw my way. My instinct is to crawl under the bed covers and sleep, let my unconscious mind create a workaround solution to the juxtaposition of happy and sad, or joyous and melancholy.

 

Reality almost always dictates that I stay out of bed, fully dressed, interacting with the real world. I simply have to put on my game face and keep moving in the various directions the tracks take me.

 

Road Runner Express wild mouse roller coaster ...

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I remember a carnival ride growing up called the Wild Mouse, or something like that. Scarier than the full-sized roller coaster, each car held only two people tightly scrunched and belted down into tiny seats. At first the contraption moved the pair of riders slowly, haltingly upward, climbing higher and higher, providing a great view of the theme park and everything around for miles. Then suddenly the ride would shoot forward toward the outside edge of the track with a near certainty that it wouldn’t make the sharp ninety degree turn ahead.

 

Sure of my imminent launching out into the open air and down to the asphalt below I would close my eyes and try to hold the lurching terror of my stomach down. Somehow, miraculously, we’d make the turn without being thrown from the mouse shaped car only to careen up or down or out or around in a crazy mouse maze of speed and height.

 

Give me a roller coaster any day of the week.

 

I read a book a few years ago called “Who Moved My Cheese.” It’s about resilience and the ability to adapt and go with the flow. At least that’s the message I took away from it. My friend Kathy pointed out to me the other day that I’ve become skilled at moving with my cheese. In my personal mouse maze of life I’ve somehow managed to not get too lost or jaded or discouraged for too long.

 

Once in a while, in the middle of some incredible happiness and some of life’s best moments, life throws out rotten tomatoes. Wrapped up in the revelry of good stuff, I’m always caught off guard by those not-so-happy zingers.

 

What to do, what to do?

 

Put on my game face. Steel myself. Hold on for dear life.

 

And enjoy the moments that I can.

Even when things are tough, life is still filled with wonderful things. If I can remember that, then I am blessed beyond counting.

 

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Food! Glorious Food!

It’s Gratituesday! Today I am thankful for the ability, resources and desire for cooking. There’s something so satisfying about taking a few ingredients, measuring, mixing, tasting and baking. I especially love working with fresh ingredients, having scents and sensations mingling into something tantalizing and new.

When I chop up tomatoes and onions, cilantro and peppers, then add a few spices, to make a lovely concoction called salsa, my favorite part is slicing a lime in half and squeezing it over the bowl. That’s the finishing touch, the little something that puts the perfect tortilla chip companion over the edge into something not simply good, but crave-worthy.

Bread

Bread, the food of love!! (Photo credit: Moyan_Brenn)

Mixing the most basic ingredients known to man, flour, water, salt and yeast is the magic formula for putting love into the air. Seriously, can you think of anything else on the planet that says comfort, love, security, safety and welcome as well as the smell of bread baking? I can’t. A fresh loaf of bread can make the most mundane meal into a feast.  Add some strawberry or raspberry freezer jam, handmade by me when berries are on sale, and it’s a perfect pairing. Satisfaction seeps into every pore.

Not enough time for a loaf of bread, some rolls, biscuits, muffins, banana bread, scones, bread sticks or even toast will do. Done with love as the main ingredient, you can’t go wrong with breads.

Don’t even get me started on deserts.

Cooking is my love language. If you show up at my house feeling blue, I’ll try to put a plate or bowl of something in front of you.

Everyone needs a few good comfort foods. I was lucky to grow up with bread baking, homemade cookies, home canned peaches, a backyard garden and a mom who taught me the basics of cooking. Joy is found almost every day as I frolic in my kitchen or sit at the table with family and friends.

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Can’t Buy Me Love, and Yet, All You Need Is Love? Lucky Me

It’s Gratituesday! Today I am thankful for love. I know it sounds sappy, but give me a chance to explain.

I’m grateful for unconditional love from my parents, MSH, my kids, and my extended family. I know that no matter how big I goof up, how whiney I get, how unreliable and messy my life is, they are still going to provide me with with love, acceptance and understanding. Even if they don’t understand, they’ll jump that bridge and love me anyway. I’ve been rescued, resuscitated, healed, helped, snuggled, succored, cared for and cuddled by these people in ways only family can offer. What more could I ask for?

And yet there is more love in my life!

LOVE Sculpture, JFK Plaza

LOVE Sculpture by Robert Indiana, JFK Plaza (Photo credit: euthman)

Shared experiences with a few people have created a love that’s definitely not romance, stronger than friendship and distinct from familial love. I’m not sure there is a word for it. A spiritual connection? It’s an understanding or an emotion that requires no words and no actions. It just is. Does that make sense? Like any rare substance, these precious few relationships are priceless and guarded carefully. Surely there’s a word for this kind of love, but I’ve yet to hear or read it. I may have to invent it.

And More!!

I’m grateful for the quirky love of friendship. Each relationship I have is different, some are easy, some are not, but all involve love and persistence and concern. I have friends I can count on for a hug. Some friends I know will keep me humble with humor and sarcasm. And others see the good in me that no mirror I own ever allows me to see in myself. I can even lay open my heart to some with complete trust and no judgment. Those who trust me in the same way amaze me and instill a desire to try harder, be better and be worthy of that trust.

Wow!

I’m thankful that so many people have given me the opportunity to get to know and love them. Thinking about all the love in my life is like stumbling on a treasure trove, chests overflowing with diamonds and gems and silver and gold. I can’t imagine feeling any richer than I do now. Love surely makes my world keep spinning, floats my boat, keeps me grounded, fills my days, lights up my dark times, and creates joy.

Yes, I’m definitely grateful for love.

 

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Love | Tags: , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Oh, Sew What

It’s Gratituesday! Today I’m thankful that my mother taught me how to sew. Can’t tell you how many times that’s come in handy. I swear I’ve sewn a zillion buttons, a thousand hems, a million tiny tucks here and there and prom dress alterations out the wazoo.

Then there’s all those costumes; pilgrim, cat, a pig for the play Charlotte’s Web, a scarecrow, a pirate, a fairy princess for a Shakespeare scene, witch, ninja, monster, angels, shepherds, devil, beauty queen, pumpkin, butterflies and bugs. Don’t forget all those princess dresses, a cowgirl, a cowboy, an Indian, 50’s outfits galore, and a genie. I could go on but I won’t.

I’ve sewn curtains, and pillows, valances and purses, puppets and stuffed animals. I even made my kids clothes when we were a really young family barely able to scrape a couple of pennies together. What a challenge but so satisfying to make something out of almost nothing.

A patchwork quilt from random scraps.

A patchwork quilt from random scraps.

My favorite things to put a needle and thread to is a quilt.  For me, there’s something therapeutic about combining small pieces of seemingly useless fabric together into something beautiful and useful.  What’s more comfort giving than a quilt, fluffy and colorful, warm and embracing. Mmmm.

I created m first quilt from a box of scraps and a few old pieces of clothing I didn’t want to throw away. Then a baby quilt, which required the acquisition of more fabric. Next, a log cabin pattern  that led me on a month’s long search for all the perfect colors. Many more have followed. My one small box of scraps grew into a mountainous collection of fabric that I may never summit.

Teaching me the ins and outs of sewing must have taken more patience than anyone can imagine.  A gift that truly keeps on giving is one that teaches a skill like this. I hope it isn’t becoming a lost art.

Such a basic ability shouldn’t be taken for granted, I can clearly see that now. Thanks, Mom, for passing on your talent, your patience, your gift, your love.

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