Posts Tagged With: happiness

Counterpoise

English: spider web with fog droplets, San Fra...

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s Gratituesday! Today I am grateful beyond thankfulness. I’ve become like a sponge, saturated beyond holding another single drop. I don’t say this in a bragging way, certainly not. No. I say it with amazement and wonder and awe and tears. If I had been told a few short years ago that I could feel such joy I would have laughed, scoffed and denied the silly notion.

Why such unrestrained, ridiculous gratitude?

  • The absolute happiness on my son’s face with his new bride.
  • The smile beaming on my daughter’s face with her CSU cap and gown.
  • The shine of love in that same daughter’s eyes.
  • A pregnancy glow in another daughter.
  • Another wedding in a just a couple of months.
  • Being surrounded by family, extended family, friends, and love.

This seems like more than any one person deserves or should have in one short period. I kind of see it as a counterbalance to a few years ago when my pendulum swung wide and far from gratitude. Maybe it’s a reminder that life isn’t always about the bad stuff, which I believed for such a very long time.

My kids deserve it. They’ve worked hard to get to where they are, to have earned such happiness. Where they are now has very little to do with me. What they have now has everything to do with their  own determination, desires, sweat, experience and even redirection.

Does a word exist that describes this pendulum swing, counterbalance, this overabundant, joy-filled time?

Sure the word is…

Counterpoise.

Sounds delicate, doesn’t it?

It is. Fragile, tenuous, weblike, lacy, barely there.

But, oh so stunning.

Take it in, breathe deeply, enjoy.

Then remember, remember, remember.

Remember.

Categories: Gratitude, Gratituesday, Joy | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Had You Known

Once in a great while I run across something that just floors me. This quote is one of those. You might want sit down before you read it.

Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known. 

~Garrison Keillor




Bench

Sure, take a seat. Think that one over.

Yup, you’ll need to read it again, slower the second time.

And maybe one more time.

Such an opposite thought to our frantic to-do list, achievement oriented lifestyle, it’s not your standard “reach for your dreams” kind of sentiment, is it? No, it’s the complete opposite of most “motivational” quotes.

Here’s an idea which is very nearly blasphemous in its quiet advocacy for contentment, fulfillment, serenity, satisfaction, happiness, gratitude, pleasure, gladness, or ease.

I like it.

Let it sift through your thoughts to see if maybe it’s an idea you need.

Categories: Wondering | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My ABC’s of Gratitude

Authors. What would I do without all those books they write?

BIRDS… my favorite morning musicians.

alphabet

(Photo credit: Jim Davies)

Color. Can you imagine living in a black and white world? Or missing even one color? Imagine no reds. Bizarre.

Dancing. It’s a big reason I fell in love with MSH. He’s good at it and makes me feel all dizzy and ditzy and graceful.

Erasers. Do overs. The chance to try again when I mess up. Most of the time, life is full of second chances, and thirds, and fourths. And luckily, I’m surrounded by patient people.

Friends of all flavors and styles. They have gotten me through some sticky situations, made me laugh and kept it real.

Gardening, another way I manage to stay in touch with nature, feel self- sufficient, de-stress and marvel at life’s miracles.

UWM alphabet

(Photo credit: 2fs)

H

Home. The one place I most want to be. It’s where I feel safe, known, cared for and accepted no matter how unreasonable I get.

Ice cream or frozen custard or gelato. I’m an equal opportunity frozen dessert imbiber. One of the pure delights of life when I was a child and still delectable as an adult.

Immediately I think of my two oldest kids, whose names start with J.  There is true JOY.

That’s the first letter of my name, one I’ve always been proud of for its quirkiness, its double meaning, and its spelling. The word Kami in Japanese is 神 which means diety, God, Spirit or even force of nature. Powerful! I like it!

Alphabet Blocks

(Photo credit: PMillera4)

My other two kids names start with L. Ah, sweet Love. And MSH’s name starts with L, too.

Music, music, music. Every kind, loud or soft, kicky or lulling. Life without tunes is gray and stark.

Nature is my balm and cure, my link to sanity. Time spent outdoors will bring me more peace in less time than almost anything else I can do.

O

Oklahoma. I lived there almost five years The weather was a bit scary at times. I wasn’t a fan of the tornado warnings, but the people made up for it. They’re some of the nicest I’ve ever known. Made me feel like family.

Parents, mine specifically. Were they ever patient and long-suffering. They never gave up hope, at least not that I know of. Lucky me, lucky siblings, too.

Quiet time. Solitude. Opportunities for my mind to wander and for clarity to settle in.

Alphabet

(Photo credit: Khalid’s Work)

R

Relatives. Yup. That big spreading family bush, as a friend of one of my kids called it after visiting a family reunion. In-laws, parents, cousins, crazies, sisters, grandparents, nephews, brothers, uncles, nieces, grandbabies, seconds, twice removeds, the uncertains. What a party!

S

Smiles. I especially appreciate those shared smiles, similar to inside jokes or you-had-to-be-there-moments. Those smiles remind me I’m not alone, that someone “gets me” and that they understand my quirkiness and worries.

T

Time with my best friend. No telling how much of it there is left, so every minute, every day, feels like grace and mercy and hope rolled into one.

U

United States is my homeland. Call me dorky or naïve. But people keep wanting to be here, in spite of all the nonsense. We’ve got it pretty dang good and I feel blessed to be a US Citizen.

Alphabet

(Photo credit: james.swenson13)

Volunteering, serving, sharing, caring, paying it forward. It’s all the same package that gives back more than I put into it. Puts a song in my heart and puts my own life in perspective.

Words. Words are my favorite artistic medium, whether in writing or reading or talking or listening. Words rule!

X 

When treasure hunting, X marks the spot where the good stuff is hiding. My life’s map is dotted with intangible, priceless treasure.

Y

Yard. I have a yard, a space for gardening, trees, a patio table and chairs, a patch of grass and some privacy outdoors. If I want to wander out back in my PJ’s in the morning, no worries.

Zany, silly, nonsensical behavior, coupled with a few good belly laughs, makes nearly every day an adventure and a joy.

Categories: Gratitude, Joy, Love | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

“Shut the door”

There's no place like home.

There’s no place like home.

“Shut the door. Not that it lets in the cold but that it lets out the cozyness.” – Mark Twain

Twain always had something to say about nearly every topic known to man. This one surprised me. It seems to indicate he wasn’t always a curmudgeon and a scalawag.

Is there anything as cozy as being able to stay indoors on a blustery day? Or as wonderful as finally throwing open windows when the warmth of spring arrives? There must be something about the flexibility of doors, allowing whatever we want in, or keeping whatever we want out.

Home, whatever its size or style, is the best place to be. It’s what we immediately think of when a catastrophe strikes. It’s where we ought to feel safest. It’s where comfort and joy can reside most abundantly.

I know I’m happiest at home. I love making the nest cozy, fluffing and straightening, baking and shining, making others feel at home and welcome.

Like Dorothy said, “There’s no place like home.”

There’s no place I’d rather be.

Categories: Joy | Tags: , , , , | 4 Comments

The Fluff and Fill of Life

The late afternoon sun hangs just above the tops of the trees as I sit on the front porch.   Pots and hanging baskets filled with Impatiens and petunias need watering, but I’m ignoring that for now. The air is just beginning to cool from the warmth of the afternoon.  A short break, sitting quietly out on the porch, is just what I need before the evening chores, kid’s baths and bedtime rituals begin.

I close my eyes and let my head lie back against the chair. A few stolen moments of deep breathing will be as good or better than a nap. I can feel the buzz of the day’s busy-ness still in my head, a kind of hum of steady movement through a list too long.  The sound of children playing far in the distance lends itself to a slowly spreading sense of calm. A car drives past on the next street over. Birds question each other with chirps and tweets. The neighbor’s dog tosses out a bark. I can feel myself slipping toward sleep. No worries if I do, it won’t last long.

“Mom?”

I can hear the call inside the house somewhere, probably in a back bedroom. I keep my eyes closed, keep my breathing quiet and steady. Maybe the sound will find a different outlet. I inhale deeper, let the breath out slowly.

Even though I can hear laughter, it seems as if it’s simply part of a semi-waking, half-dozing dream. When the screen door beside me protests with its squeaking and rattling, I open my eyes just slightly. I do not, however, turn my head, or speak, or move.

My two little girls stand in the doorway, the tallest of the two holding the door open. They look at each other and cover their mouths to stifle their giggles. They whisper something back and forth to each other. The screen door creaks slowly shut, the latch just catching.

I wonder sleepily what the giggling means, and peer carefully through my lashes.

My two girls hunch down at the sidewalk beside the mailbox picking dandelions from the lawn. I could expect to find a bouquet in my lap any minute now. My youngest stands with her small scrunched cluster of yellow flowers and white puff-balls. She puts her face into the bouquet, but instead of inhaling their muzzley smell, she puffs her cheeks out and blows. She watches as her little handful of treasures explodes into small white umbrellas, tiny seed pod passengers dangling below.

dandelion_2008041638

dandelion_2008041638 (Photo credit: 邪恶的正太)

My older daughter quickly follows with a breath of air and a sort of magic wand wave of the bundle of white and yellow. White wisps float away. They both laugh and each quickly gathers another handful, this time ignoring the plain yellow dandelions. They snap only the stems of white fluff. Instead of blowing on the whole handful at once, they each take a turn blowing the seed pods free from one stem at a time. From a distance a passerby would think they were blowing bubbles from a plastic jar of soapy solution.

Empty stems fall on the sidewalk as they stoop to pick more. One sends her flower heads skyward while the other chases, jumping and flailing. Their laughter bubbles over, a refreshing sound to my ears, a nice respite from their usual bickering.

Time seems to slow to a stand-still, yet the sun drops lower in the western sky, now filtering through the topmost branches of distant trees. The angle of light at this time of day brightens colors, exaggerates whites, shows off every dust mote and hovering insect.

I watch my daughters as they do a sort of slow motion ballet. The two young girls gather more handfuls of glorious white weeds and send them heavenward. They create a blizzard of fluff filled with the sound of their delight. Surely they’ll tire of this game soon, I think to myself as I observe their leaps and laughter. Instead, they take a cluster in each hand and spin in a circle, creating a swirling breeze that catches and carries the ephemeral seeds in loops and eddies.

Sunlight wafts through the scene like an added sound of joy on the breeze. Each poof of white shimmers and dances. The halo of curly blond hair on my youngest daughter glows silver as she spins and dances and smiles. My older daughter’s long brown locks capture the light and create a golden aura as she twirls and leaps and laughs.

Peace settles like shimmering star-dust on my shoulders. The music of the moment fills the air and swirls through me as these two small angels dance in a fleeting vision.

It comes to me, clearer than any revelation. Heaven is here. Heaven is now.

Categories: Joy, Memory Lane, parenting | Tags: , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Now That’s Surprising! It’s Gratituesday!

folded.

Folded Towels. (Photo credit: Greg Timm)

It’s Gratituesday!  Today I am thankful for surprises.

Some surprises are as simple as finding the dishwasher already emptied and ready for the next load, or a pile of laundry folded by someone other than myself. Receiving a real, handwritten letter or card in the mail brings pleasure that lasts. Volunteer flowers in my garden charm me; an unexpected hummingbird hovering a couple of feet away can change the tone of a day.  A repair costing much less than quoted or finding an item I need on sale, nice!  Hearing a honk and getting a wave as a friend drives by gets my giggle on. Something like finding some crinkly money in a jacket pocket from last year is rare, but so fun. And, what a smile I get when I find just the right amount of change in the car to splurge on a soda.Silly, huh?  Not really.  It’s those tiny thrills and small enchantments that add spice, flavor and joy to my life.

“Let’s try an Experiment,” I said to myself

A bunch of years ago, I started an experiment.  I started writing down a few things, every night before turning out the light, that made me smile, that blessed my life or that brought some happiness to the day.

Some days, many days at first, required some deep thinking to get even three items on the list.  Other days I couldn’t stop writing at just five or seven happy things.

What a difference it made for me.  I started looking during the day for those few things I could list in my notebook that evening.  I made a mental note of the rabbits in the field next to the stoplight.  I paid attention when my daughter hugged me extra tight.  I remembered when my son took the garbage out without being asked.

Here’s a sample list:

  • Clean Sheets.
  • The sound of the wind.
  • Hearing my children’s laughter.
  • A kiss.
  • Fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies.
  • A cold glass of milk.
  • Time for reading.

Sure, some days I felt deflated and defeated.  On those days, defaulting to the basics was the best I could come up with; my health, my family, a place to live, adequate food.  Life hasn’t been all roses, not at all, just the opposite, in fact.  There’s some rough terrain out there if I look back at the path I’ve taken.

Most days, though, I made an effort to be grateful, to be aware, to let the little happinesses get through to me.  I slowed down just enough to be in the moment and take joy in it.  Then I’d make my list that night, short or long, without fail.

For me, writing down those happy things made an impact.  Writing made those blessings last, in my head, and on paper, tweaking something in me and shifting my thinking. Being grateful changed me for the better. What a nice surprise.

Am I ever thankful for that!

            *****

For ideas about starting your own Happy Book or Gratitude Journal click here.

Harvard Medical School published an article about the health benefits of gratitude.  Click here to read it.

A great recipe for Chocolate Chip Cookie nirvana is waiting for you to click this. (You’re on your own with the cold glass of milk.  I prefer 1%, though an occasional, rare, splurge on whole milk is divine.)

Categories: Gratituesday, Joy | Tags: , , , , , | 4 Comments

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